Authentic Living, Awareness, Personal Resonsibility

The Catastrophic Nature of a Lie

Lies. To me, they are one of the most destructive powers on the planet!

It hurts if I’ve been lied to. It hurts when I see other people lied to. It hurts when the nature of a person is to fabricate a lie, and some people do this for a living, or perhaps recreation! Big, fat, lies. This is contrary to a little white lie that spares someone’s feelings…

“dinner was delicious”

“yes, that outfit looks great on you”

“I’m sorry but I can’t come to your party, I already have plans”

“your new haircut looks fun, edgy!”

Yes, these too are lies; however, the intention is not to protect ourselves, but to protect someone we love. I’ll be honest, I try to speak even the tiniest sliver of truth to whatever I feel as opposed to telling a white lie, but it happens. Telling a white lie typically depends on the capacity for the recipient to handle the truth and let’s be real, if the person isn’t ready to learn the lesson on the value of honesty, it can be harmful if not detrimental for everyone to force it!

The catastrophe I’m talking of is the self-serving lies. What do they serve? The ego. Here, lies will protect the illusion that the world revolves around the person and are usually fueled by the fear of death. Not physical death but the death of who they think they are. Death of the Ego. People will go to great lengths to perpetuate and protect their sense of self and they’d rather tell lies that hurt others than accepting responsibility for poor choices or poor behavior and suffer the consequences.

Things come apart so easily when they have been held together with lies.”

Dorothy Allison

What I’ve witnessed and felt in myself when lied to is shock, disbelief, betrayal, numbness, insecurity. At the onset, it’s hard to be rational or logical. The world seems to have turned upside down. What once was believed good and strong, in fact, is revealed as deficient and a sham.

Like any natural disaster, the clean-up takes time. First and foremost, we need time to work through the pain. Take time to feel it so eventually we’ll be able to move past it. Take time to assess the damage. What can be repaired, what needs to be replaced and what needs to be removed? And most definitely, take time to build a new way of life that is strong and solid and learned.

Healing doesn’t mean the damage never existed. It means the damage no longer controls your life.”

Akshay Dubey

Lies have a catastrophic nature. They destroy everything in the vicinity without prejudice and lack sensitivity. The liar has broken pieces they can’t see or can’t mend or they’re unwilling to mend. The target now has broken pieces too, but also has the choice to move on from this explosion and heal what’s been shattered, possibly, with a better understanding that all we can do is live fully knowing the risks that nothing is or will ever be perfect.

Most likely we’ll be lied to in our lifetime. Yes, it hurts and yes, it’s hard to process, but it’s how we handle it that makes the difference. Have courage. You can make it through this!

Keep it Simple,

Just Teri


12 thoughts on “The Catastrophic Nature of a Lie”

  1. Powerful post. Lies are catastrophic definitely.

    White lies is an interesting one if recipient can’t take the truth. I tend to stay quiet, which might be even worse. White lives for the good of others, or deliberately no sharing something that might hurt a dear one, I feel it is okay, especially if it will cause emotional discomfort. Sometimes ignorance is bliss.

    Hard one 🙃

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Teri, I certainly agree with you about how the white lies are to protect others from getting hurt (but most often when the truth comes out, it causes double the pain) and self serving lies where the liar’s intention is to protect oneself or rather one’s ego. Those are the worst kind.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I love how you pointed out that white lies are to protect others and malicious lies are told to protect the liar. That is so insightful! I’m with you; lying is the worst.💕

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks Collette. Yes, malicious lies are the worst and usually the hardest to forgive.

      I find the worst thing about lies is the sting when the truth is revealed…and I believe the truth is always revealed❣️

      I think most of us can empathize with lying whether it’s done to us or someone else. I know I do. It’s painful to hear someone being betrayed by a lie. 🤗❤️

      Liked by 2 people

  4. It is a sad life if you feel you can not communicate honestly with those you interact with. Often some may feel they can’t be honest for fear of rejection. In fact, in the world we live in right now, sometimes it can be dangerous to speak your truth. Oh how I long for an environment where we can be honest with one another and accepting of each other. I shall still speak the truth… or say nothing at all. But hopefully I will always show kindness.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Yes Lisa. I’m right there with you. I love how you put it…Be honest or be silent but always kind! It is sad how it doesn’t seem safe to share an honest opinion in kindness these days. 😕

      Acceptance, especially in a relationship is key to walking in truth ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

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